March marks one year that my husband and I decided to part ways... well, not in that way.
In the best of ways, if there ever was one.
In a way that seemed to call out to us... live differently, daringly, trust Me, I've got plan for you two, and it will prosper us.
The us being the kingdom of God.
Kind of how we have trusted God all the days of our marriage. We haven't always done conventional, typical.
Does God call us to that?
I've never found typical in scripture, more so in man made wisdom... live safely, comfortably. Don't take too many risks.
This means we live apart more than together. I have no words to describe how hard this can be or the peace that God has given us. Surely, God is good and His plan can be trusted.
Yet, I remind my husband the day he is over this, decides he wants his wife back 24/7 he needs to let me know. I will trust that if I hear those words, God is in it.
You see, my husband is a glass half full, or overflowing kind of guy.
He sees the choice we make as one that is honoring to God... even when we are unsure of what exactly it is God is calling us to do.
You may be thinking... then what the heck are you doing? Why? What's the deal?
When you are planning things with God, you wait on Him.
Instead of plowing ahead, you seek wisdom, discernment. If you want to do a work that will last, with excellence and eternal results, you wait for the Master to give directions.
It took a year for the dust to settle, for the hubs and I to create a new routine, to be ready and steady to go forward. Many times it is better for the game to come to you. Use your giftedness, abilities and wait for the return. This is how you find your sweet spot, that place that God has put you, to serve Him.
At least for me this is how it is happening.
One of my passions is helping women recognize their God given potential and giftedness, seeing themselves as Christ sees them. Creating a community of women that seek to build one another up, living in freedom from the lies and hurts that some have been sold as truth.
Bring a group of women together that have an interest, whether young or mature in faith, it will be amazing what will occur. Leaders will rise up, hearts will open, forgiveness and healing will be found. This is community and this is what God has delivered in my lap.
I have a choice... and yet do I?
This is what I am praying wisdom and discernment over... in these moments.
It is what wakes me in my sleep, seeking clarity and a desire to do His work with excellence.
I look to Hebrews to remind me why...
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus..."
My desire is to run this race in front of me, with passion, endurance and the eyes of a runner looking to the finish line.
Oh yes...Jesus, let me fix my eyes on You, and Only You.
A year from now I will look back and read this.
Will I have moved forward in wisdom, doing a work God has delivered to me?
In truth, what I have asked Him for... do I recognize it as answered prayer?
Or will I have wasted another opportunity?
What is God calling you to this year and will you grab hold of it and honor Him with excellence or look back with regret next year?