Waiting

Every time I turn around its wednesday or Sunday... two of my favorite days where I could hang with the coolest people I know. High school and college students. Add to that my favorite adult leaders and it was a good day.
Those days are gone.
Today is a new day.
A day of opportunity.
A day with a few more hours it seems.

I have time. I am ready. I have told Him yes. I have trusted Him.

He has brought me to a quiet place... if just for a little while.
I am fighting Him tooth and nail in this.
I can feel it in my bones. He is drawing me to Him and I am resisting. He is pulling me to quiet in Him, to reflect, to learn, to see with new eyes. I don't know if I can do this.

I want to say yes to God. I am screaming yes to Him inside and it seems He is looking away.

God, use me.
Don't you want me to be useful?
Do you have a need for me?
Lord, you know I want to serve You.
I know it has only been 14 days, but how long will I have to suffer? Hmm..." daughter, daughter" he must be saying....

Psalms tells me, "Be still and know that I am God"
I love this scripture.... I just don't want to obey it.

The dust needs to settle. I need to see where He is leading, so that I can follow. I can't walk this path if I can't see Him. Going forward without him will leave me lonely and lost.

So I wait.
I will be still and know that He is God.
Scripture tells of times where God refined His people... often in the desert. I doubt they enjoyed that time... but they obeyed. Hope I don't have to wait 40 years.

Maybe you feel that way right now. Don't give up. He is whispering to us, "draw near to Me daughter, and I will give you rest. I will show you what I have for you, when you are ready."

Trust Him with all of it. We don't have to understand all His ways to trust Him with all our lives. He knows the plans He has for us... and they are good. Read His book and you will see, it ends well.

He will use us in His time, not ours. Then we will bear fruit, for Him and for eternity. Thank you Lord.