Hope...

This morning I planned to start October strong.
Thirty days of solid writing.

A month of Hope.

Hope floats.
Hope for dopes.
Hope gloats.. that's always pretty.
You get the idea.

I was thinking of a book coming out today called Let Hope In.
I was able to read it before it came out... it's good,
I need to read it again.
Pete Wilson is the author. It's a worthy read, because we all need the kind of hope he is sharing.

The morning did not go as planned. Did yours. I'm sorry if it was anything like mine.
Maybe we should pray for one another.
Honestly, I was struggling with hope and then I added a layer of...
sadness.
Yes, I was sad.

I went on with what I had to do... except for the writing part.
I was struggling.
Yes.... struggling.
Trying to make sense of a few things.

LIKE, why do you allow these things GOD?!

I asked you about this God. We talked about it, remember?!
I asked you for protection of the heart.
I asked for wisdom and discernment.
You know how important this is.... God, you KNOW!
You let me down.
You let her down.
Maybe a month from now it won't feel like this, but today...

Then I read this...

Psalm 46:10
"Be still and know that I am God."

and this...

Ephesians 3:16
"I ask the Father in His great glory to give you the power to be strong inwardly, through His spirit."

and this

"God is God. He knows what He is doing. When you can't trace His hand, trust His heart."


And I still struggle, but I let some hope in. I know deep down Who He Is.. and He Is Good.
But this moment, it still hurts.

Do you ever feel this way?