November is my favorite month. The month my grandfather and I would celebrate our birthdays two days apart.
The month that my daughter was born, 5 days after my birthday.
The month of Thanksgiving... my favorite holiday.
The cool weather, the color of the leaves, the smell of wood smoke climbing up and out of stone and brick chimneys.
Putting away the summer toys and cozying up in my house with pumpkin candles and a warm fire.
I am guilty of the hearth and home cliche, with soup on the stove, cider in my cup and gathering around the harvest table.
I love this season.
This fall will be different, never again the fall of yesterday.
I have lived this fall before, life changing as I try and cling to the leaves and smells I am familiar with.
Loss is around the corner, my friend from the past.
Remembering my daughter being born in early fall, my first husband, also born in November, ill and dying before my eyes.
This November I am not in my new home, getting cozy.
I will not walk my puppy among the crunchy, orange leaves, holding my sweet husband's hand.
It is not cool where I am, no frost on the pumpkins here. More a crash of the waves kind of feel.
My grandfather has been gone some years. He celebrates everyday.
I will not celebrate my birthday as planned.... the husband had been going to great lengths. Made me tired listening to his plans. Wow,thanks sweet man.
This November I am reminded to rely on God's grace and peace.
A dad who is dying.... literally, in front of my eyes. Oh, how hard to keep them open, when they want to squeeze shut, not seeing.
What to do, but pray and hold his hand.
A blessing to be able to do that.
This November I am reminded of the One who holds all of us in His hand. The One who spins the earth with his soft touch and reminds the sun to rise. The One who greets us each morning with new blessings.
May we celebrate November and look for the blessings that we might miss throughout this month. May we be generous to a fault, kind to where it hurts, living with eyes open to His mercies and graces.... watching for the daily miracles.
We will all experience loss and pain in this life, but He is here, among us. He will never leave us or forsake us. Let us remember that truth and share it with the hurting.
"I will never leave you nor forsake you."